Demo-Critical Dance. It’s the Final Countdown, tat ta tan tan.

Long Long time ago, during the dark ages, also popularly know as the Kal-yug, which has been continuing till date – Naseeruddin Shah in his pesky voice bellowed in a film personifying the holy trinity of Hindu Gods Brahma, Vishnu Mahesh – "Paap se dharti fati. fati fatii...Adharm se aasmaan...Atyachaar se kaampi insaaniyat... Raaj kar rahe haivaan...Jinki hogi taaqat apoorv, Jinka hoga nishaana abhed...Jo karenge inka sarvanaash...Woh kehlaayenge...Tridev! Tridev! Tridev! "

Now if you have fallen from your seat while laughing your ass off, let me translate for my English brothers and sisters and LTTE brethren who understand only Tamil – “Thy sins blasted the earth and non-belief smothered the skies, humanity shuddered under tyranny, reeling in a Satan’s rule…those whose’ power will be unique, whose’ aim will be impenetrable…those who will annihilate such devils, they will be called The Trinity…trinity…trinity (that’s echo for you).

Now that reminded me of politics or what! The 15^th rendition of dance of democracy has clearly seen some weirdest of acts, with most of politicians confining themselves to Nu-age TWIST and SAMBA…only here when the senior citizens turned politicians ‘dance like their allies and foes’ and all are watching. An old saying goes further that work like you don’t need the money; ahh irony. 

And then we have nine (or more) contestants for the post of prime minister…that is one less avatar God Vishnu (10 avatar yet to be taken), the eternal maintenance keeper, ever manifested. From low intelligence level animals to higher intelligence animals…i.e. Men/part men part animals etc. But the problem is that he (Lord Vishnu) has played all those roles.

These days every tom dick and Harry wants to become the prime minister. The nukkad ka paan wala told me he is running for lok sabha (nothing wrong in it) but then says he will weigh his options in post poll scenario and then decide if he can become the Prime minister (that’s total dementia, I must say). He thinks it will be good for his business as well. Mayawati said if Man-Mohan (total macho) can become prime minister, allegedly a puppet doll, why can’t she? Lalu, Ram Vilas Paswan and Mulayam (not so macho; literal translation of name means soft...lol) – the fourth front musketeers all are in race to become P.M….as if mother earth was tired of Gandhi tyranny and Rath yatras that now she went pleading to these Be-Hari sons to deliver her from sins past 1947 committed by the last 14 sitting committees (Lok Sabhas). The real emergency begins now, so they say.

There is our very own Marathi Manoos Sharad Powar, who is in the race as well. He intends to commercialize India’s affairs like what he did in Cricket and IPL. He will outsource it to South Africa or England. India will come full circle then. L.K Advani at the age of 80 is still hoping to become a Prime Minister. Hope can work wonders in some people. He intends to bring all the black money in Swiss banks back to India to make Ram Mandir in Ayodhya with the same money retrieved and a customized Rath, a chariot (costlier than Sharrukh Khan’s vanity van) will take him pan India. Where there is a M.G Road, there will be Ram Mandir on it. And world will pray in it.

Lefty Kung Fu expert Prakash Karat(e) – he just loves Mao Zee-Dong. He is in the race to be P.M too, all through the third front. He does not want the Americas to come as close as Afghanistan as well. He is an egalitarian, who is keen on tapping into the Moslem vote bank and thinks they (left parties) can do wonders in coming elections, with Third Front. Now before you confuse yourself, third front came before fourth front. Lalu and the gang are members of third front, fourth front and all will be decided after results are out in post poll scenario. They have not said no to congress and UPA as well.

Where most of India is aiming to become Prime ministers in this recessionary times, how can the south Indians be left behind. TDP chief Chandra Babu Naidu the one who changed the face of Hyderabad and lost badly in 2004 when he neglected Farmers is also in the race. He is part of Third front as well, earlier he was a part of NDA and ally of BJP, but, is of opinion that he lost because of BJP. Call it hallucination or delusion, but the dude plainly forgot to envision what all the IT folks would eat if there would be no agro based industries. He complements Amitabh Bachhan. His hair is white and beard is black…or something like that. The dude advised Sanjay Jumaani, the noted numerologist in Bombay to change his name and add ‘J’ in the surname to make it JumaanJi-all based on a computer program coded in Ramoji studios of the Hyderabad. Even Jaya-lalitha aou (sick Shakti Kapoor accent) and Karunanidhi are in the same race as well.

The junk Indian news media said India needed an Obama. Yeah right. We have 9 types of Obamas. We have Obama in every cast, sub-caste, creed and color as well. Hindutva-vadi Obama, Sikh Obama, Yadav Obama, Dalit ki Beti Obama and also a brand new “Free Telangana” Obama. There is an Tamil loving LTTE Obama as well. Heck, after China, we can mass produce Obamas (read ek Obama, Anek Obamas). All manufactured in Ulhas Nagar and Delhi safdargunj.

After all wasn’t it JFK who said, Ask not what you can do for country but what your country can do for you? Err, that’s altered keeping Indian sentiment in mind and to cater to countless number of vote banks and Swiss Bank account holders.

Meanwhile, somewhere near South Block:

Morpheus to Neo: Did you vote neo?

Neo: but what is real, who is real?

Morpheus: Pan card, driving license and Bangladeshi illegal immigrants.

Neo: No, I meant about the world, in a broader sense.

Morpheus: Yes, Manmohan’s prime minister-ship and his decisions are real, in a broader sense.

Neo: What about the oracle behind him?

Morpheus: She is real too.

Neo: What? How come?

Morpheus: Because I believe.

Neo: Give me the god damn Red Pill. I better wake up and believe what ever I want to believe.

Now that’s democracy, is it not? Keep it real. And keep your fingers crossed. You never know, which of these “MACHINES” will swear in as the next P.M. But, swear they all will.